Friday, February 12, 2010

Person 1: What makes you think that your problems are bigger than everybody else’s?
Person 2: The fact that they’re mine makes them bigger than everybody else’s.

People have a tendency to be self absorbed when they have problems. This is true even for myself. You get consumed by it, that it becomes your world and perhaps somewhere there you drag others into it. For sympathy perhaps? or for just plain “ I want to keep talking about MY problems in the off chance that it might all go away in the process of my letting it out.”

Initially you get the sympathetic looks and sympathetic queries and somewhere there you do/did enjoy the “pity party”. Eventually though, and I understand why, it can get old and tiring hearing someone whine and complain about how sad they are or how unfair life is. Same with me.. and I got tired too of listening to myself

I understand that sometimes when one is faced with a problem, all they feel like doing is dig a hole and bury themselves in it. I felt the same way and I initially didn’t have plans of coming out from that hole until I got tired. It can get pretty exhausting feeling frustrated, angry, confused, and miserable. And when you get to the point that you are just so worn out, you realize that you have got to do something else about it… it is time to MOVE ON.

Think about it.. what good would it do staying buried underground? What good would it do walking around feeling dead inside? What good would it do when it does not change anything? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE THE ONE TO CHANGE.

Easier said than done, right? I agree. Believe me it was not easy for me either… and up to now I still find myself wanting to crawl back into my hole and find comfort in melancholy. But why find comfort in such strangeness?

The world is waiting and is happening without me in it… I can choose to stay miserable or I can choose to relearn how to find joy in my life. Life can get normal again (I read on other WHS parent’s blogs and pictured myself wearing their shoes). Right, it may be riddled with endless doctor’s appointments, and perhaps a limited repertoire of activities… but it is possible to achieve that sense of normalcy back.

It’s not an easy task (seems like I’m preaching to the choir here) But I have got to stop looking at my problems through a microscope… zoom out! The world has bigger and more serious problems...wars, famine, pestilence. Think about it? I have a child… I have new life! I’ve got to start nurturing that life!

When all this started it was all about ME, ME, ME… when really, it should be mostly about HER.

“When we can’t piece together the puzzle of our own lives, remember that the best view of a puzzle is from above. Let HIM help you put it together.”- Amethyst Snow Rivers


Lauren said...

Couldn't agree more! Amen and Amen, girl!

This is a wonderful post and I am so excited about our perspective.

Love to Isabella!

Hannah said...

You have a really talented way of expressing yourself. I appreciate what you write. I have an 11 month old little girl with WHS, so I can relate to most things you are writing. I's not easy, but we will all do well on this journey.

SisforScorpio said...

I'm happy to see that you have been able to connect with other 4P- families. Once you get connected, the families are such a good resource, better than any doctors, because they actually have experience. Our daughter (with 4p-) just turned 3 and she is doing great. You can get an idea of our life at Contact us if you'd like.

isdadoinks said...

yes the WHS parents are great! they give me a picture of what lies ahead... you know to round off the edges a bit.