When in a threatening or dangerous situation people either resort to "fight" or "flight". I know myself well enough that I flee an uncomfortable situation.
But how do I flee this situation?
I've thought about it... running away.
I've thought about it... giving her up for adoption.
I've thought about it... leaving her in front of a hospital or a firestation.
I've thought about it.. mailing her to the Jolie- Pitts
I've thought about it.. bringing her back to the hospital, tell them this was not what i ordered, tell them i was an unsatisfied customer, give them the receipt and ask for my money back.
I've thought about it... killing myself.
But this does not really solve the problem does it? Ignoring the existence of the syndrome does not really cure it. And besides a syndrome is not a form of disease or sickness. it is not something that can be resolved by a pill. There is no cure. A syndrome is a condition.
I guess as a form of isolating myself and escaping I kept myself busy. I would find myself constantly cleaning or cooking. I would find myself getting my hands busy with scrapbooking. I would find myself making frequent trips to the salon. But, what happens when there is nothing left to cook or clean? What happens when I finished all my scrapbooks? What happens when there is no more cuticle left to push and take out because I have had one too many manicures and pedicures?
My problems will still be here won't they? Ignoring the problem, especially this one, will not make it go away.